TUESDAYS

What IS it about Tuesdays? Lately, I've been irrationally angry in a big way on Tuesdays. Something about having to work a short shift in the evening after a typically long day at the church... For some reason, stress gets me on Tuesdays more than other days of the week. AGH.

Potluck Bum

I am officially a potluck bum- I brought nothing, and ate EVERYTHING. It was delicious.

Scared

Promised my brother I'd post, so here it is...

Played music for another wedding. I absolutely, positively LOVE/HATE weddings.... for serious. It was fun to see a lot of people I haven't seen in a while, and I am unreservedly happy for the two lovebirds, but nonetheless, this wedding was no exception to my general feelings towards nuptial celebrations. The current working theory is that I'm both of two things:

1. A hopeless romantic.

2. Crazy lonely.

Ordinarily, I'm against whiny blog posts, so I've tried to couch my feelings in analytical language. There are a myriad of questions floating around in my head pertaining to all this... or maybe "floating" was a less-than-accurate word choice. They're at a full boil, more like. Right now, however, I'm taking the brain pan off the hot plate.

Time

Time feels like a dog that paces at my side, sometimes stopping to sniff something-or-other, sometimes yanking my arm out of the socket as it drives forward. Just when I begin to think I know which end of the leash I'm on, it growls at me, reminding me that it answers to no man. We walk through strange and wonderful landscapes past strange and wonderful people, and it slowly dawns on me that we do, in fact, have a destination. Unlike walks with most dogs, this walk doesn't end where it began- or if it does, nothing looks the same to me anymore.

Wait... I was a teacher?

A former student of mine had the audacity to mock me on a certain social website just now. She implied very strongly that I was lazy when I graded students' assignments, because they would write ridiculous things on them and I wouldn't catch them. This irks me for two reasons, really:

1. I poured my heart and soul into that job. I cared deeply for those students.

2. She was right, after a fashion.

I'm realizing that there are certain aspects of teaching 6th graders at which I was simply not skilled, despite working hard to overcome these deficiencies. I lost patience often, I wasn't as vigilant as I should have been in grading, I didn't always come up with the most effective or imaginative lesson plans, I missed countless opportunities to demonstrate Christ to students and to love them well... Maybe I had to come through it and look at it from hindsight to see it properly. Regardless, I intend to learn from the experience now, even as I sought to learn from it then. But why did I have to hear about it from some disrespectful, incredibly insightful punk kid?